Name: GoofyAppearance: Dark mustaches
Age: 17
Unique Trait: has a dragon tattoo on his back
Environment: small high school
Problem: bad eyesight
<-My Characters :)
People say love is blind. My friends would agree to this statement when thinking about my love. Yes, I’m in love.
LOVEHe has a dark mustache, which highlights him and reveals his ethnical identity as an Italian. He lives next door, he goes to same high school with me, and he plays cello in “Welton High school Orchestra”. He also participates in a varsity swimming team, astonishing people with his dragon tattoo on his back. (He said that he simply got a dragon tattoo because he didn’t have good eyesight to distinguish dragon with tiger. But it seemed like he was satisfied with his dragon tattoo covering up his back.)
He is as funny as his name, Goofy. (You would be laughing at this phase, I know that. Well obviously, “Goofy” is not a word that sounds smart.) Goofy and his friends are famous for leading a flash mob in a cafeteria or volunteering for the advertisement model for the famous Chinese restaurant (The humorous thing is that none of them were Chinese. Only Goofy had a dragon tattoo which would be the most “chinish” trait.) He is quite different from me: He is “the famous” one while I am “a normal” one and he participates a lot of club activities while I just have a small chat with my friends a bit in a school.
But still, he is the one who I can have a casual talk with and who always try to boost me up when I have a long face. We first knew each other when we were assigned to do science project together. And for the whole semester, until the due date for the project, we have become good friends, rather than becoming typical acquiantances. After discovering that we lived next door, we became closer and closer.
And today, I went out with Goofy: watching a movie. Although it's kind of sad that Goofy might just think it as a friend-to-friend meeting, but...who cares? Still, I went out with him!
The 'date' itself was just normal. After school, we went to the cinema, watching a comedy movie. We had a pizza after that, and got back to each home. We talked about the everyday life, a science experiment we are working on, television celebrities, sports, and a bunch of things. Goofy was humorous enough to make our 'date' jovial and lively. Touching his dark, Italian-like mustache, he brought up a lot of subjects amazingly smooth and fluent.
Before scattering, Goofy said that he really enjoyed the movie and all the other things. He tried to say something more, but he didn't. What would this hesitation mean? Does that mean that he also likes me, more than just friends? Well...I hope so. :)
Anyway, I gotta sleep. I have a world history class tomorrow.
To. Diary
Until the last few paragraphs, I thought that the narrator was just secretly having a crush on Goofy, but it seems that they are actually dating out and on the brink of actually being couples.
답글삭제The Things I liked about this
1. I like how you linked Goofy's name with his actual characteristics. It was fun and clever, personally.
2. The contrast of how "I" is a normal person while Goofy is the school's "interesting and famous" student seems interesting - they are the exact opposite. The hint of the tone in the last paragraph of how actually Goofy kind of likes "me" seems as if he likes "me" because they are so different.
3.Your tone in the story is mostly communicative, that is, it is close to actually "talking" with the readers, which felt (as a reader) more candid.
(+) Anyway, I gotta sleep. I have a world history class tomorrow. at the end - this felt as if not only "me" in the story but also the actual author - Soho - had a quiz the next day. lol :)
답글삭제The Things I think this work can improve
1. If the date was so "important" to "me" I thought that it might have been better if it was actually more elaborated then simply making a "normal event" list of what they did together. After all, Goofy ended up kind of liking "me", and I thought that if that was seen throughout the date, it might have been less sudden.
2. Maybe it would have been better if you explained earlier "how" the "I" fell in love with Goofy, regardless of his scary traits (tattoos and what not)
3. not much else!